Today we were us again

Today we made dinner. Today he chopped while I whisked. He read the recipe aloud as I combined the ingredients. He pulled me in close and we almost burned dinner.

Today we laughed. We loved. Today we were us again.

Today we found a counselor we liked. I left work a little early and we sat down and said what was on our hearts and our minds without anger. Today we felt safe and in the presence of good counsel. Today we were us.

Marriage is a journey filled with passionate professions of love and ardent apologies. Sometimes I look at this man, who I eloped with on sunny South Beach day, and I am in awe of him and the miracle that is us. A times I look at this man, who does not know how to walk away before a conversation becomes an argument, and I mentally want to drop kick him in his face.

Love is a wild thing; it has many seasons, you have to find someone willing and able to weather them. There was a moment when I thought, I do not know if I can weather THIS.

There was a moment where this marriage did not feel beautifully wild but like a desolate wilderness. It felt like hopelessness. It felt like death. It did not feel like us.

But today we found that somehow we were no longer in a wilderness of our own creation. We found love, we once again found us.