Finding Your Child’s Literary Love Language

Y’all we’ve been reading every day! I’ve discovered my kid’s literary love language, and it’s a game-changer. I’ve read dozens of books this year, but not as much as I would like to, keeping it light because COVID-19 has all parents booked and busy. But getting the kids to read daily and enjoy it, this is a source of joy.

Here is what I did to identify my children’s literary love language

1. Start by paying attention.

Pay attention to what they gravitate toward. The cartoons they love. The movies they happily rewatch a million times. The video games they like to play. Then see if they take to similar books.

I started with graphic novels for my son based on his favorite characters or shows, Spiderman and Carmen Sandiego were a big hit. Then I noticed that my son really loved his basketball class and talked about it with enthusiasm, I picked up The Crossover graphic novel by Kwame Alexander and it was love at first chapter. My daughter is really into stories about girls she could see herself in or had some level of grade level drama you could learn a life lesson from, Just Jaime by Terri Libenson and Ways to Make Sunshine by Renée Watson really resonated with her and she even started binge reading and finishing books in one sitting.

2. Create incentives and boundaries.

After you identify books that resonate with your child, you still might have to encourage leisure reading. What worked for my kids were a set of rules:

• 30 minutes of reading to earn an hour of video gameplay
• 30 minutes of reading before they were allowed to play outside
• 30 minutes of reading before they could watch tv

After a few days I found that my kids would read on their own first thing in the morning, and add “can I go ride my bike, I already read today?” Can I play a video game, I read for 30 minutes. We made reading an everyday part of life.

3. Model the love for reading.

Let them see you reading. Let them hear you talk about how much you love or excited about a book you are reading or just got in the mail or from your public library’s digital library.

I was rereading and rewatching The Hunger Games series in preparation for the newest book and my daughter took notice. She begged me to watch the first Hunger Games movie and to read the book. And this is the first book she picked up this summer.

Since she started reading Hunger Games she’s been asking so many interesting questions about poverty and power. She’s processing some difficult concepts in real time with me. It reminds me of all the things I really appreciated about that book. Make sure you are talking about the books your kids are reading, ask them how it makes them feel or if there is anything they want to talk through from the storyline. Stay engaged in small yet impactful ways.

Finding your child’s literary love language is not about getting them to read more but helping them to see the joy in reading. Moving them away from believing that they “don’t like to read” and getting them to understand it is a matter of finding the right book at the right time. Teaching another generation to love and respect storytelling and the written word.

Best Practice:

If you have sensitive children or if there are topics that you would not like for your children to first encounter in books but you don’t have the time to pre-read literary contenders, research them on Common Sense Media. Common Sense Media defines the recommended age, summarizes certain content like violence, language, or sexual innuendo. It gives parents the best overview of a book outside of reading it themselves so they can make an informed decision for very young readers.